How Long Should I Wait?

Here we are well into 2014, and I'm just making my first post of the year.

During my daily peruse of CNN.com, I came across a very interesting article titled -- The 'Big Lie' in Putting Off Pregnancy.  Of course, I was intrigued so I dove in.  After reading the second paragraph, I wanted to give Tanaya Selvaratnam, author of The Big Lie:  Motherhood, Feminism and the Reality of the Biological Clock, the world's biggest high five!

*graph from Management of the Infertile Woman

Like me, she believes in the importance of promoting fertility awareness EARLY.  If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: Women need to understand the full scope of their fertility BEFORE struggles with infertility begin.  "If we know better, we do better." That's what Oprah says, right?  Gaining fertility awareness early, allows women to make the best choices for themselves and their future families.

You should definitely check out the article, but here are a few thought-provoking quotes:

Egg Retrieval - Part Two

The darkness lifts as they wheel me out of the OR.  I hear voices, but I can’t tell if they’re talking to me or about me.  I attempt to speak and lift my head, but quickly resign.  I really don’t have anything to say.  Plus, my head feels like it weighs a thousand pounds.  Hilari lightly touches my left forearm and says, “They got 13 eggs.”  I smile and drift into slumber.  

Day Eight

My eggs may be ready for retrieval Monday.  Once Dr. Bendikson receives the results of my blood test on Saturday, she'll have a better idea.  The guestimation is that ten eggs will be retrieved during the aspiration.  Although that's a good number, it’s not as many as I hoped.  I wanted closer to 15.  Honestly, I know I should just be grateful everything is progressing smoothly this time around.   Plus, ten eggs is better than no eggs.  Right?

Follicles & Eggs

I can definitely feel the physical difference between my regular stomach and my hormone injected, swollen ovary belly.  My ovaries irritatingly ached the entire day.

Day Five

I went to the doctor this morning for the standard: blood work and ultrasound.  After the examination, the doctor announced my follicle growth is on track.  Unlike last time, the meds are being distributed to each follicle; none of them are hoarding.  Her exact words were, “It’s really going to happen this time. They look good. We'll do the retrieval next Tuesday."  Considering the bumps along the way, I'm excited to be close to the end of my egg freezing journey! 

A Private Decision

 In my egg freezing quest, a particular phrase keeps reappearing - “It’s a private decision.”  In general, I agree, but for some reason the word private nags at me.  Maybe it’s because as a kid I remember my friend’s mom say, “That’s our private family business, she doesn’t need to know.” 

As my thoughts simmer, I realize that I associate private with silent.  When I concentrate on silent, it leads me to the word fear.  My brain continues to process and I decipher the difference between the two words.  Private allows me to be selective with what and who I choose to share information.  Silent prevents me from discussing out of fear.